Me: Do you want to chat up Jacob?
Mom: No way. I don’t like that one-eyed weirdo.
Me: Jacob’s the black guy.
Mom: Oh! Yeah let’s talk to him. I like Jacob.
Shepard proceeds to flirt with Jacob, and he offers to buy her a drink some time.
Me: You’re doing a lot better with him than you did with Kaidan.
Mom: Kaidan’s a tough nut to crack.
We head over to the tech lab and talk to Mordin.
Me: Anything you wanna ask him?
Mom: Not really—
Dad: Tell him he has a cute butt.
Dad: Tell him you wanna smooch his face.
Mom: No! He’s ugly!
Dad: Do it.